Sometimes, I wonder why people compare themselves with others. What does it achieve? What benefit does it bring? In my view, comparing yourself with others often leads to nothing but pain and disappointment. It chips away at your self-worth and fosters a constant cycle of dissatisfaction. Yet, it’s something so many of us are guilty of—myself included.
The Futility of Comparison
When we compare ourselves with someone seemingly better, whether it’s their marks, job package, or recognition, we often overlook one key fact: their journey is different from ours. More often than not, the people we admire have worked incredibly hard to get where they are. Their success didn’t happen overnight, nor did it come without sacrifices and struggles.
If we find ourselves falling short of their achievements, could it be that we haven’t put in the same level of effort? Maybe we need to work harder, smarter, or more consistently. Comparison blinds us to the reality that everyone’s timeline is unique, and instead of drawing inspiration, we end up belittling our own progress.
The truth is, the results we achieve are often in direct proportion to the work we’ve put in. If you’ve worked hard, you’ll have a fair idea of what you can expect to achieve. And once you understand this connection, you no longer need to compare yourself with others. What you’ve achieved is what you deserved at that moment. Accept it, be satisfied, and resolve to do better next time.
How Comparison Reduces Your Value
When you compare yourself to others, you’re essentially saying, “I’m not good enough.” You devalue your own worth, your unique abilities, and your journey. This self-imposed disbelief is harmful—it creates a barrier between you and your goals. It saps your confidence, leaving you doubting your capabilities, and eventually, this doubt affects your performance.
I’ve been through this myself. I used to compare myself to my classmates and colleagues all the time. “Why did they get better marks than me?” “Why do the teachers recognize them and not me?” “Why are they getting a higher package than I am?” These questions haunted me. I couldn’t see past their achievements, and it began to weigh me down.
But day by day, I began to realize the futility of it. I stopped looking outward and started focusing inward. Instead of worrying about others’ successes, I decided to hone my own skills, put in the effort where it mattered, and trust my journey. Over time, this shift in mindset brought me peace, and I saw real progress in my life. Even now, I follow the same principle.
The Reality of Human Nature
It’s interesting, isn’t it? When we compare ourselves, we almost always choose those who are ahead of us—richer, more successful, scoring higher marks, or living a seemingly better life. But have you noticed that we rarely compare ourselves to those who are less fortunate?
Why don’t we measure ourselves against someone who has less? Someone who struggles harder for basic needs? Someone who hasn’t achieved what we have? The reality is that we naturally gravitate towards admiring those above us while disregarding those below. It’s human nature to idolize success and overlook the struggles of others.
But if we paused for a moment and compared ourselves to someone less successful, we’d realize how far we’ve come. We’d see the value of our efforts, the results of our hard work, and the privileges we often take for granted. This shift in perspective can cultivate gratitude and a sense of satisfaction. It’s not about belittling others but recognizing and appreciating your own journey.
The Hero of Your Story
The biggest lesson I’ve learned is that you are the hero of your own story. Your life is not a competition against others; it’s a journey of self-improvement and personal growth. Comparison often leads to chasing someone else’s dreams instead of pursuing your own. Don’t let that happen.
Focus on your goals. Work hard, put in the necessary effort, and trust that you’ll achieve what you deserve in due time. Use the success of others as motivation, not as a yardstick for your worth. The key is to learn from their journey without losing sight of your own.
And most importantly, don’t let comparison steal your happiness. It’s easy to get caught up in what others have and forget to appreciate what you already have. Take pride in your achievements, no matter how small they may seem. Celebrate your progress, and let that drive you forward.
The Right Way to Use Comparison
While comparison is often harmful, it can also serve as a tool for growth—if used wisely. Instead of letting it breed jealousy or disappointment, use it as an opportunity to analyze and improve.
Ask yourself: What is this person doing differently? What can I learn from their approach? How can I adapt these lessons to my own journey? This mindset shifts comparison from being a source of negativity to a catalyst for self-improvement.
However, the key is balance. Don’t obsess over others’ successes to the point where it diminishes your own efforts. Learn what you can, and then focus on applying it to your life.
The Power of Self-Belief
At the end of the day, the only comparison that truly matters is the one you make with yourself. Are you better than you were yesterday? Have you learned something new? Have you taken a step closer to your goals? These are the questions worth asking.
Believing in yourself is the most powerful thing you can do. Trust that your hard work will pay off. Trust that your journey is unfolding exactly as it should. And trust that you are capable of achieving greatness, in your own time and your own way.
Final Thoughts
Comparison is a bitter foe, but it doesn’t have to control your life. By focusing on your own journey, appreciating your progress, and using others’ success as inspiration rather than a source of envy, you can break free from the trap of comparison.
Remember, you are the main character in your story. Your path is unique, and your goals are yours alone. Work hard, stay true to yourself, and trust the process. In the end, you’ll find that the only person you need to compete with is the one you were yesterday.
And that is a race worth running.